Drill, Baby, Drill

With only a few weeks left in his presidency, George W. Bush decided to commence offshore drilling. Upon reading of this event, it seemed likely that the drilling locale would be, dare I say, Alaskan. However, much to the surprise of HNN, Bush has chosen Virginia.
We suppose Virginia is an alright choice, after all, she is a nice girl. However, in times of desperation- when you need a baby-, why choose someone that may be infertile? Experts state that Virginia may be hiding reserves of oil off her shores, but America needs a baby now, and that baby's name is Oil.
Bush has stated that in addition to the potential Virginia has shown, her parents(the government) are much friendlier about the drilling. Good luck Bush, get out your dipstick and look for Virginia's oil.

Bombings Out, Shoe-Throwing In

"Muntadhar Al-Zeidi, a correspondent for an Iraqi-owned television station based in Cairo, Egypt, could face two years' imprisonment for insulting a foreign leader.

When he threw the shoes, he shouted at Bush in Arabic, "This is your farewell kiss, you dog! This is from the widows, the orphans and those who were killed in Iraq." Al-Zeidi was tackled to the ground by Iraqi and U.S. security after throwing his shoes at Bush, who deftly ducked. " According to FoxNews.

And with Al-Zeidi's hate-act came a fun, new popular Iraqi fad: shoe-throwing. Killing people with strap-on bombs was so 5 minutes ago in the Iraqi world. Today taking off your own shoes and violently throwing them at people you dislike is so chic.

But really, the only thing stranger than a grown man throwing his shoes at the President of the United States would be that Iraqis wear shoes. I never knew. I only assumed that with all the sand they have covering their land that going shoe-less was commonplace...