On Sunday, November 30, 2008 a true tragedy occurred in an Orlando Walmart. A man came into Walmart wearing a grey and white flower print dress. He was attempting to rob the store while threatening a cashier with his handgun. In a fit of anger, this dress-wearing man fired two shots into the ceiling- probably because he was so embarrassed at his fashion mistake. A black jacket (probably pleather) over his granny-style grey and white floral dress is a sure way to scare off future friends and lovers. He is undoubtedly lonely, for if he had any friends at all they surely would have helped him throw together a cool, hip robber outfit. Preferably something all black, very sleek, matched- without looking like he tried too hard- with a breathable, tight black nylon face mask. An outfit like that would have given him a cool, knowledgeable exterior equipped with an inner confidence that I bet the dress didn't.
Word to all future robbers out there: dress for success. That phrase is not only directed at businessmen- you too can empower yourself with the clothing articles and accessories you put on.
