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Saturday, May 2, 2009

A Proverb: the 10 Year Old English Girl & the Tanning Bed

The idea of girls going to tanning salons is not a new one- nor is it a crazy one. But when that girl is 10, the dynamics change, because, you see, that is getting crazy. Especially when that 10 year old girl is pale, and from South Wales, England.

As we all know, English folk are pale, and they just do not soak in the rays that well. Another thing people understand, or should understand, is that children, namely human beings who can not legally drive, should not tan their baby skin, since it may be sensitive and burn easily. But apparently, Sharon Hannaford, pictured above (the guilty-looking, pam-an(derson) eye-browed one) was unaware of these information basics. Sharon let her 10 year old butterball bake in a tanning bed for 16 minutes. After the 16 minute baking time, butterball was rushed to the hospital due to the 70% of her body that became badly burned. Doctors theorize that if baby creamy-face were to have stayed in that bed for 2 more minutes, she would have needed skin grafts. But luckily, the result of the 16 minutes is that she will have to spend the next 10 years of her life indoors and away from any sunlight.

Let us think about this. A ten year old gets badly burned for being in a tanning bed for 16 minutes. Not only am I not shocked, but I this whole story really pisses me off. If a 10 year old wants to be tan, i'm sure she also wants a belly button ring and a tattoo of a butterfly with Chinese writing above her ass crack. And that is such a horrifying vision, i wish she did burst into flames. I am surprised this happened in England, and not in our America land. Thank God.

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